Girls Day

April was explaining to her husband how much fun they’d had at the beach during her “girls day” outing.

“But,” she told him, “It didn’t end all that great for me.”

“Why, what happened?” he asked.

“I went out to take a swim in the rough water but I didn’t go out far because the waves were very bad.

Then I suddenly noticed that all the turbulence had caused the lower half of my bikini to be stripped off.

I looked and looked for it but it was gone, gone, gone!”

“For goodness sakes, sweetie, what did you do?”

“Do? Why I did what any respectable female would do,…
… I covered my face and eyes with my hands and ran to the beach house as fast as I could.”

–Here I Was! Sitting At The Bar–

There I was, sitting at the bar, staring at my drink!

A large trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig.

He says, menacingly, as I burst into tears: “Well, whatcha’ gonna do about it?”.

I yelled at him: “Come on, man,”.

Then, he said to me: “I didn’t think you’d CRY. I can`t stand to see a man crying.”.

I replied back to him: “This is the worst day of my life, I’m a complete failure. I was late to a meeting and my boss fired me. When I went to the parking lot, I found my car had been stolen and I don’t have any insurance. I left my wallet in the cab I took home. I found my wife with another man and then my dog bit me.”.

I continued: “So, I came to this bar to work up the courage to put an end to it all, I order a drink

I drop a capsule in and sit here watching the poison dissolve; then you show up and drink the whole thing! But enough about me, how’s your day going?”.