Co-Parenting Collaboration: The Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin Approach

When Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin revealed their decision to “consciously uncouple” in 2016 after a 13-year marriage, they were determined to handle co-parenting their two children thoughtfully.

“I really wanted my kids to not be traumatized if it were possible,” Gwyneth told Drew Barrymore in 2020 about the turbulent time. “Chris and I committed to putting them first, and that’s harder than it looks.”

“But [Chris] and I both really did not want to have them experience the divorce as a trauma…,” she told Bustle in 2023.

“We knew it would be hard, of course, but we didn’t want them to ever feel in the middle, or that one of us was slagging off the other one.”

“At that time, I did a very me thing, which was when I knew I wanted to get a divorce, I did this data collection of talking to adults who had been products of a broken home,” the actress explained.

“Every single one of them said, ‘I didn’t care that my parents got divorced. That wasn’t it….But the fact that they wouldn’t speak to each other, that they couldn’t both sit at a dinner table for my birthday…’ They said that was the most awful thing.”

“You could see they held it with so much hurt and anger,” she continued. “I was like, ‘That’s what I’m never going to do.’ And we really didn’t.”

Now, more than eight years later, the couple continues to set an exemplary standard for maintaining a healthy dynamic within their blended family.

Both Gwyneth and Chris have entered long-term relationships with Brad Falchuk and Dakota Johnson respectively, yet their primary focus remains on their children, Apple, 19, and Moses, 17.

“There’s no handbook for this,” Gwyneth confessed during a Q&A earlier this year, discussing co-parenting and her role as a stepmother to her partner’s two children. “There’s no guidance out there. Moreover, the way stepmothers are typically portrayed in the media is quite negative, almost villain-like.”

“It feels a bit like navigating through a minefield. You’re entering a family with its own dynamics, and there’s always this fear of loss and questions about what your role signifies.”

“However, once I fully embraced the idea that my stepchildren were just as much my kids, and I loved them equally, providing the same guidance and boundaries, everything started to fall into place. Now, it’s actually going quite well.”

In March 2024, Dakota Johnson shared insights with Bustle about her relationship with Chris Martin, his ex-wife Gwyneth Paltrow, and their two children.

“I absolutely adore those kids; I love them with all my heart,” she expressed about Apple and Moses.

Discussing her bond with Chris, Gwyneth, and the children, Dakota noted, “I come from a large family, and I’ve always believed that ‘Blood is thicker than water.’ The bonds you choose to form can be stronger than those with your biological relatives.”

She referred to Chris, Gwyneth, Apple, and Moses as her “new family,” adding, “In my adult life and within my new family, most of us are artists. Even the kids are incredibly talented. So, you’re interacting with very complex individuals.”